Thursday, 14 February 2019

Jackpot247.com and the Closed University



Today I am very tired.  Yesterday I was very tired so went to bed early only to wake up early in the morning.  So I switched my TV on to discover that ITV from 40 minutes past midnight to 3am is now one long giant casino.  Fixed odds betting terminals may have been banned from the high street but shift workers like me are secure in the opportunity that they can now always lose their money suddenly after a very long shift.  It’s a mystery to me – a man who grew up in an era when Sid James used to have to slip out the house surreptitiously to the betting shop to carry on his accumulators behind his wife’s back – how the gaming industry get away with being so out in the open.  As beer and fags become ever more taboo it’s more and more incongruous how shameless and invasive gambling and gambling advertising has become… it seems to get in everywhere … I may have excluded rats and mice from my kitchen finally but I’m sure I shall go in one day to find that someone has set up a casino in the fridge.

Moreover I also seem to remember when adverts and TV programs had to be separated by an iron curtain … adverts and product placements were not allowed in content and visa versa.  These rules have been relaxed for a while but Jackpot247.com takes it to a whole other level.  The program is the product (gambling) while also the advertisement (for gambling). It's like QVC if the presenters had had their personalities surgically removed.

Indeed so successful is the financial orobous that is Jackpot247.com  that I’ve been watching for over an hour now and have seen no advert for any other service or product whatsoever.  None is needed because this is a 2 hour 20 minutes advert for gambling.  And it’s so dull - there's no variety because there is ultimately only one product... at least with QVC you can laugh at some of the tat they sell.  Two young ladies in sparkly dresses stand in front of screens and wheels and invite viewers at home to phone in their money.  People do.  It’s as thrilling as a Blue Peter charity appeal “Totaliser”.

I have many vices.  I even enjoy beer, cigars and even the odd flutter or scratchcard but how people get hooked on gambling is beyond me.  Yet they do – it ruins lives.  If you wonder why here’s a story ... 

Once upon a time I was interviewed for a job by a gambling company who were interested in me since I know about arcane rapid development languages such as TCL TK.  Now, I have a degree in physics but even I found it difficult to understand some of the higher level mathematics employed to separate the punters from their hard earned and grappling with it was enough to put one off gambling for life… Not since I got turned down for a job with a missile manufacturer have I felt so intellectually out of my depth (I don’t know why they rejected me – I mean it’s not rocket science, is it?) … Because the people who run gambling are incredibly smart which makes the odds of beating them...?

Years ago I used to go to the Tottenham Court Road Casino because it was one of the few places in Westminster one could get a drink after hours.  However, even the prospect of subsidised booze could not induce me to stay long in the rooms of people with dead eyes pulling one arm bandits or staring blankly at tables while bouncers hover in the corners. Gambling is like the ring in Lord of the Rings - when the novelty of going invisible subsides people find that they are unfortunately permanently invisible to society.  Even lottery winners become invisible ...as they cower away from the prying jealousy that results from unearned wealth.  Jackpot247.com has one thing up on real physical casinos and that’s that there are no dead eyes and lost souls to see – those are out there beyond the studio.  Safely going bankrupt in privacy…

Okay everyone’s got to earn a living …even turf accountants … but come on … is there no better use for a premium digital freeview channel at night than this?  I mean I wasn’t expecting the return of the Open University (after all that’s now pay for content) but Jackpot247.com ?  Is that really where we are as a society? In fact if you think about it this is the reverse of the Open University.  Once late night TV used to be about intellectual elevation and obtaining qualifications - now it is about people with MSCs and PHDs in STEM separating the plebs from their disposable income.

Also please take down the balloon hearts – Valentine’s day was yesterday…

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