Thursday, 19 March 2020

It's probably a virus...



The virus outbreak continues with terrible consequences such as seeing Boris Johnson on the television every single day.  On the 15th of March there was one confirmed case in Croydon.  By the 17th there were 4 ...
...and by today the 19th there are 32.   

As I am off work this week on holiday I have been self-isolated anyway…

Went to the supermarket for Ava Alexis to find it’s all gone a bit end of days... clearly no one is afraid of Ray Daley...
 
Andrew O’Neill started sending me content because his gigs are cancelled then informed us all that he has succumbed …

A lot of children are on my television telling me it’s absolutely terrible that there’s no school and they haven’t been forced to sit exams.  How will the human race survive without bits of paper to tell each person what jobs they are allowed to do and where they fit in the social hierarchy…?  Suddenly the team structure of society is looking a lot flatter…

The inevitable bitching about who is going to pay for it all is in full swing…

Wednesday, 18 March 2020

Apocalypse Elstree

I heard someone saying the other day that there's nothing on the news except the virus... and indeed the BBC has gone full apocalypse by stopping filming Eastenders.  Oh well, it's not all bad.  Perhaps in a national emergency the last thing people need is a depressing soap opera. 

Seems they're giving up a bit easily though.  Perhaps they could relaunch as a wireless program with the actors all recording their lines separately in self isolation?  Wasn't there an episode that was just Dot indoors all alone with a tape recorder or something...? 

Monday, 16 March 2020

Stop bulk buying or Arthur will send Raymond to give you a slap...






Back in the real world I went to Sainsburys at 10:40 last night.   Usually I drop in after work to pick up a few supplies being the kind of person who only has two days of food in the fridge and knowing that I have only 15 minutes till it closes and should have gone earlier.  A lot of people were in there for 15 minutes before closing time and I failed to make the connection with panic buying at the time.  On twitter I saw Stephen Fry saying that everyone should become more kind given the circumstances.  But I feel it’s going to take a bit more than that to stop Sainsburys turning into the scene from a John Wyndham novel.  I’m sure a lockdown is coming but the danger is not just this virus but the virus later mutating.  It’s been a while since the last major virus pandemic and so it’s not that surprising that we have one...  Funny how when I went in today the shelves of all the things that had been raided were long life or fresh produce.  Clearly the poor aren’t panicking as much as the rich…

Over at the independent there’s quite a good article about people panic buying loo roll.  Paranoia about going to the loo.  It's soft, strong and very long...

Sunday, 15 March 2020

All those Timeless Child plot holes put in one place by someone with infinite patience



The more I think about it the more horrible the finale is.  Plot holes happen in long running franchises.  The deeper problem is an emotional one.  Tecteun is basically the Rani crossed with a child abuser. I don't know if that's misogyny or misandry or extreme dystopia but it sounds to me like the worst idea in Who since the 6th Doctor strangled Peri...?  This used to be the program that inspired me to go into science and now its like... Urgh. Still the production team have their creative freedom. That's what's important.

Thinking about this though and Daniel Barton's totally pointless torture of his mother in Spyfall... That doesn't move the plot along at all?  Does Chibnall have some kind of problem with mothers...?

I mean what next? A celebrity historical about Myra Hindley...?  This so makes one appreciate RTD and Steven Moffat.  It even makes me appreciate JNT...

Thursday, 12 March 2020

It's the Wind of Change, Ted...



Since I seem to have wandered away from the usual subject matter of this blog which is my own neuroses I may as well review some other things I have watched recently.  I have just finished watching the box set of the whole of Hi-de-Hi.

It’s just as entertaining and uncool as it always was.  I’ve always been a fan of Paul Shane’s portrayal of Ted Bovis.  There’s so many things about being a comedian that they get right.  Interesting nods towards the then current innovation of “alternative comedy” too.  Much of Spike Dixon’s dressing up in funny costumes is surreal comedy or attempts at it and this comes in for continual criticism from Ted who often lectures him on “the first rule of comedy”.  Ted has an infinite number of first rules of comedy but most of them are “you must have reality, Spike”.  

Quite often Ted makes valid criticisms of Spike’s costumes and quite often not...  It’s interesting how many early episodes end with a short location scene of Ted and Spike outside the camp reflecting philosophically on elements of the episode.  And it’s a poignant moment later in the run where Spike and Ted are flying a kite together but Spike has to leave to go on a date with April.  “But, Spike, we always fly the kite together! Spike!  Spike!”  

While Spike is designed to be the Jiminy Cricket to Ted’s scheming, greedy plotting he’s not without vices himself such as stinginess, pomposity and tactlessness which gives the two a lot of scope for interesting interplay.  There’s something Laurel and Hardy about them – indeed a highlight is the episode where Ted gets everyone arrested by organising a pornographic film screening only to be saved by the fact that the prudish Spike has substituted the porn film with a reel from a Laurel and Hardy picture.

Ted, while the more successful comedian than Spike, still aspires to better things but is constantly thwarted by the lack of sophistication in his comedy – the highlight of his routine being “famous people sitting on the toilet”.  When going down badly at a posh dinner Ted tries to save himself by picking on a Jewish man in the audience only to be told he’s “being anti-Semitic” …”I don’t even know what the word means?” he protests.  It’s clever how this seemingly old fashioned sitcom mirrors the real politics of comedy at the time.  

Professor Jeffrey Fairbrother is an interesting character.  You have to wonder why his marriage broke down.  I don’t know if he’s meant to be gay but he’s not really interested in any of the female characters.  Which is difficult what with Gladys Pugh’s unrequited love sometimes wandering into borderline sexual harassment.  It’s amusing how Jeffrey honestly lends some of the other girls records and books and doesn’t seem to notice how mad this makes Gladys.  I particularly enjoyed his explanation of Geroge Orwell’s 1984 to Gladys.  To which she tartly responds that it’s no more than an upmarket version of “Old Moores Almanac”.  Jeffrey attempts to explain how dystopian fiction is different to astrological prediction but gives up half way admitting “…you may have a point”.

It’s fun too how when Jeffrey leaves Gladys manages to transfer her affections swiftly to Squadron Leader, the Honourable Clive Dempster DFC.  Clive Dempster grew on me as a character watching it again.  In the first series he acts all devil-may-care but it’s interesting how his attitudes quickly change after his family find out that his relationship with Gladys is serious and cut off his allowance.  “I need this job, Ted!”  The Queen gets a cameo too via archive film…

Su Pollard as Peggy Ollerenshaw … she makes such surreal things seem believable and believes such surreal nonsense.  Possibly her best scenes are where Ted convinces her of completely unbelievable stories involving international espionage in order to manipulate her into doing what he wants.  Her ambition to be a yellow coat is such a small one but she has to go through so much to achieve it … including the Harvey Weinstein like attention of head office hatchet man Alec Forster.  

When Peggy does achieve her dream of becoming a yellowcoat it’s because Clive asks head office who he should appoint and they say “you decide”.  Because of course they don’t care – the decision has already been made to make everyone redundant.  Alec Forster delivers the news in the style of middle managers everywhere who have been trained by HR “to take the person out of the decision” and fool themselves that they’re not being cruel.  Fortunately he’s a psychopath.  

Peggy isn’t the only one either with a #MeToo storyline.  Gladys has to repel the unwanted and bullying advances of the head office “smiling viper” Harold Fox played by Gavin Richards before he became Captain Alberto Bertorelli.

Every series has a lifespan and possibly the passing of Leslie Dwyer (Mr William Partridge) as the children hating Punch and Judy man marks the beginning of the end.  He obviously passed away after the location filming of series 6 because he's in many of the film inserts but missing from the studio stuff leaving Fred Quilley (Felix Bowness) sharing his usual chalet dialog scene with Mr Partridge with a plumber fixing his sink in one episode...

Dwyer puts in a marvellous performance making Partridge seem at once horrible and bitter and at the same time strangely philosophical and cultured.  I was particularly amused by how often he blames organised religion for all the evils of the world and yet at the same time frequently quotes the Bible “It’s a Graven image!” (the statue of Joe Maplin).  But when he can see a way to make money out of religion it’s a different story … “Sing you sinners!”

The final shot of Peggy Ollerenshaw walking back into the now empty camp to echo of “Goodnight Campers” then turning round to jump in the air and shout “Hi de hi!” as she freeze frames was still in my memory as it was 32 years ago.  

Oh, well everything has to end sometime.... 
Even Max von Sydow’s lost his chess game now…

Not Only ... But Also... MI5

Yesterday I was unfriended by someone on Facebook.  I questioned the narrative generally wheeled on in articles such as this  that all the B...

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