Not really a Smart One

Of all the parsimonious stupid ideas that annoy me top of the list is the so called "Smart One".

This brainwave of a shit idea was thought up by the world's most parsimonious person to make sure I use the absolute minimum of bog paper to wipe my arse with. 

It only dispenses one sheet at a time and makes out bog paper to be so expensive it needs to be kept under lock and key...

The manufacturers claim that these things reduce consumption by up to 40 % and I'm not surprised as half the time they jam and you can't get anything out.  However by this time you've evacuated your bowels believing that a toilet roll was available to you not imprisoned in a perspex box.  

Really if your expenses are that far stretched I'd rather go back to hard toilet paper in public lavatories.  At least no one gave a shit how much I used...

I don't know who is responsible but someone's hands are dirty... as well as mine.