Fake Post

Me (1st from right bottom row) and the other inventors of the internet

Apparently Damian Collins MP has decided that there is too much bullshit fake news on the internet.  It is about time someone said this.  I’ve been complaining about this since I worked on the ARPANET project in 1969 and no one has taken a blind bit of notice of me.  “It’s all very well everyone just talking to each other but one day someone’s going to notice everything on the internet is twaddle and piffle,” I said.

“Yes,” said Lawrence G. Roberts, “what we will need are safeguards.”  Then we both wrote a strongly worded letter to our MP insisting action should be taken before the internet ended up filled with nonsense.

Personally I can think of no better person than Damian Collins MP to make sure that all the propaganda is cleansed from the internet so that it is just crusty old computer boffins swapping equations again.  If Damian was in charge there would clearly be no nonsense and we wouldn’t have to worry about the easily swayed being swayed by Russian 5^th columnists who start fake twitter accounts.

Let’s go back to the good old days when only responsible media outlets were allowed to broadcast or print news.  Organisations like the BBC where all the staff were properly vetted by MI5 men who used a system of dressing them up as Christmas Trees to make sure they were not soviet agents.  Those were the days … when we had proper newspapers like the News of the World who made sure only real and important news reached the world. 

I’m starting a D-list…