I tried to review Monk. Here's what happened...

 

I've now watched every episode of Monk because it's all on Netflix and like Everest ...it's there.

Although I remember it going out at the time I don't think the BBC paid for all the episodes so I missed a lot and this filled in a lot of the gaps ...making it more of a continuing narrative.  Apparently the project spent a long time in "development hell" before being green lit because they found it really difficult to find someone to play the central character.  I'm not surprised... even in the more innocent times of the 90s it must have been difficult to find someone to play someone with every phobia going without it becoming offensive, corny or just naff.  Monk's world isn't really real but a kind of bizarre melodrama posing as a procedural.  Although we know it is a comedy it is just on the edge of believability... and there's also the dark edge that someone always dies (sometimes quite graphically) every week.  As Columbo used to say "they don't even bring us in unless someone's dead."

Monk is of course surrounded by other eccentric characters.  The avuncular Captain Leland Stottlemeyer with his disintegrating marriage to a TV producer and the wide eyed innocent Randy Disher who are there to do the plodding police work (the influence actually is Sherlock Holmes with Lestrade being the model for Stottlemeyer) ...and his two assistants - first Sharona Fleming and then Natalie Teeger - who act as the audience surrogates.  Bitty Schram and her ancient Volvo are particularly good at grounding the series with a sense of reality.  Natalie Teeger is deliberately much posher... There's too much going on in Monk to actually really review it in any meaningful sense.  It tries so many ways to stay original - although one feels in series 8 they're starting to run out of road ... how many variations on the same basic story structures can be managed...? but there are so many gems ... Randy and Natalie trying to watch a football match on a TV stolen from the evidence room, Jarrad Paul's scene stealing performances as Kevin Dorfman, Sarah Silverman as the obsessive fan, Teeger's attempts to turn Monk into a PI, Brad Garrett as the builder, Sharona breaking it to Natalie she was paid more, Agoraphobic Ambrose, Monk's father, Jason Gray-Stanford's physical comedy moments and his "buddies in blue" .... and, of course, the unforgettable penultimate episode cliffhanger.  

I was going to try and write a meaningful review but ... here's what happened...... a jumble.

It's a jumble out there...

On the subject of cousin copulation...

As ever on the pulse of the important issues of the day Conservative MP for Basildon Richard Holden has brought forward a Bill to outlaw First Cousin Marriage, telling tales of how it increases greatly the chances of genetic illnesses being passed down.  The risk of birth defects in offspring of first-cousin marriages is estimated to be 2-2.5 times higher than in the general population, largely because of autosomal recessive disorders (see here) but as that's from a very low base the risks are still very minimal (Victoria and Albert popped a lot of children out and most of them were ok - if you disregard the hemophilia and Habsburg jaw).  The risks do grow greater if the pattern is repeated over generations.  However, when cousin marriage was banned in the past the bans were very hard to enforce.  Are people going to be banned from being legally married or imprisoned for incest? 

Other famous cousin lovers include Christopher Milne of Winnie the Pooh fame and Albert Einstein... although perhaps they might have thought twice if they'd understood genetics... which was not really fully scientifically understood then...

However, this seems to me to be something of a moral panic... Mr Holden quotes this Times article (which must be important propaganda as it is not behind the firewall) which reveals the real impetus ...a fear of "clannishness" ... "This is why, to get to grips with clannishness, I’d suggest we must target marriage customs directly" ...in other words the real aim of such a law is not genetic safety but an attempt at social engineering.  Mr Holden believes that not inbreeding makes society more stable... One wonders then why such Tories seem almost inevitably to be fans of Royal Families...

This week, I’m introducing legislation to @HouseofCommons that would end first cousin marriage (ie, when you share a set of grandparents)

Eagle eyed @dp_williamson at @Daily_Express has spotted it in tbe order paper and written up the story >>> https://t.co/g8w2jfZJDM

In the…

— Richard Holden MP (@RicHolden) December 8, 2024

The book fetishists of Blue Sky

 

So having wandered over to Blue sky from twitter I find it littered with a different type of chronic bore.  The kind of person who masturbates over how many books they have.  One of them uploaded this photo as if it were a good idea to hoard books in this manner... I told them they needed to visit the charity shop.  The kindle has been invented and no one can actually read that many books... Particularly when you need a ladder to reach them.  He responded defensively that the books didn't belong to him but "a bookseller friend".  So it isn't even a personal Library.... And I was not impressed.  I don't know about the words in the books but I suspect none of them are on interior design.

Pear Shaped S2 Episode 4

 

That peace platform he stood on is going well.

Hell to pay?  Has he seen Gaza?  It's just displaced people, 40,000 corpses and rubble... You could nuke it and no one would know the difference.  Benjamin Netanyahu probably would have but then it wouldn't be any good for Israeli settlements.  100 * 40,000 / 2,000,000= 2% of the population and Keir Starmer's still trying to tell us this isn't a genocide despite the ICC arrest warrants... For context only 25,000 people died in the firestorm of Dresden.  The Nagasaki nuclear bomb killed 60,000–80,000.  The 1990s Bosnian Genocide included only 8,372 killed at Srebrenica and another 25,609–33,071 Bosniaks and Croats killed if one takes a wider definition of genocide.  Even looking at "normal" conflicts... Only 25,000 people died at the Battle of Waterloo.  300,000 at the Battle of the Somme.  Of course it's not on the level of The Nazi Holocaust - 6 million (Auschwitz alone killed 1.1 million) or the Rwandan one (800,000 in a week) but still...  Gaza only has 2,000,000 people to rub out.  Less now... Blocking aid is particularly despicable...

The Banks write

 Dear Mr Miller 

Due to changes in the Bank of England base rate the interest rate on your savings account is going down and the interest rate on your mortgage is going up and we think you're dumb enough to suck it up.

Yours sincerely

All the Banks

Chinny Rub of the week ... Louise Haig

I cannot believe (well, I can) the number of people willing to defend Louise Haigh who has just resigned as Secretary of State for Transport after it emerged that she stole a mobile phone, was convicted for it and received an unconditional discharge.  Oh well, this is the party part of which still listens to Alastair "I'm not a war criminal" Campbell....

Here's the facts... 

Ms Haigh claimed she was mugged and lost the phone.  She reported it stolen to her employer and the police.  She then "found" the phone and turned it on again so the Police knew exactly where it was from its IMEI number which was being uploaded to phone masts as soon as the network detected it.

Ms Haig claims that this was an accident... but even if she had found the lost phone why would she turn it on?  After all, the SIM would have been disabled when it was reported stolen.  

To actually use it she'd have to put a new SIM in.  Here's a picture of Ms Haigh's story...

Louise Haig's Story

Now at this point someone else might be able to say "Well, I didn't understand police procedure...".  Unfortunately this sounds a bit hollow as Ms Haigh had previously been a Special Constable from 2009 to 2011 in the Metropolitan Special Constabulary.  Did she learn nothing in that position?  Or did she think her mates would cover up for her?

Ms Haigh's employer Aviva reportedly was not happy but opinion is divided as to whether they actually sacked her (different news outlets carry different versions of the story).  Some say she resigned and others ... Well, this is all very odd because the incident happened in 2014.  And Ms Haigh was at the time standing for Parliament.  So whilst it may be a spent conviction now it wasn't at the time Haigh was selected for Shefield Heeley in May 2014.  Did she declare her conviction to the Selection Committee or the Electorate in 2015?  

She must be particularly jammy to have managed to go down the Magistrate's Court, get convicted and manage for this not to be noticed by any ladies and gentlemen of the press at the time.  

I'm not saying no one with a minor conviction should ever stand for Parliament but in the interests of transparency perhaps they should have to declare their convictions?  After all, it can't hurt.  Donald Trump has 34 felony convictions and he's President of the United States.  It's no bar to a career these days.

It would be possible to feel some sympathy for Ms Haigh if she admitted wrongdoing but she's still fronting it out, claiming that she only stayed silent in the police interview and pled guilty because her solicitor advised her to.  Perhaps he did so ...because she was clearly guilty?

Chinny rub.

Welcome to Britain

 

Dear Anthony, The holidays are upon us and this year we are celebrating the power of community.  We're asking supporters like you to share your messages of solidarity so we can send these to people living in the asylum system and display them in our offices. Words are powerful and every message you share shows people that they aren’t alone, and that there are others standing beside them on their journey to safety.   Here are some of the beautiful messages we’ve received so far: “I wish all of you seeking refuge a very peaceful and happy Christmas 2024 and a safe and secure home in 2025.”   “Welcome to the UK. You are valued and you are special and my husband and I wish you all the hope love in the world.”  “Do not lose hope – there are people who care about you and will support you. Your life is as precious and important as everybody else’s.   Thank you so much for your words of kindness. We hope you have a wonderful start to the holiday season.   Laliesha Fundraising team Refugee Action Dear Refugees, Welcome to Britain  It's just like America  But with more rain Less money And Universal Healthcare

Spare a thought today for all the Pelican Crossings

Top Tip : Straight people.  Spare a thought today for all the Pelican Crossings who are suffering from Metropolitan Police Institutional Homophobia.  You may not notice them immediately but they're out there.

Meanwhile across the pond...

 

Meanwhile in Russia...

 

Protesting Farmers garner Marie Antoinette levels of sympathy...

Got to admire farmers in their optimism ....coming to the centre of a town where everyone pays Inheritance Tax at 40% on any property over £325,000 (The price of a 2 bedroom flat in the suburbs) and whining about paying IHT at 20% over 10 years on over £1,000,000.  Surely this can only inspire Marie Antoinette levels of sympathy...

Over at the Telegraph the Landed Gentry who threw us all off the agricultural land during the Enclosure Acts have deployed a Duchess to tell us all how unfair this is.  I don't know why they didn't get Audrey fforbes-Hamilton in and be done with it.

But apparently they need to completely avoid IHT in order to preserve their way of life because they are "asset rich but cash poor" and need to leave their farms as indivisible entities to their offspring.  Matthew Stadlen asked the obvious question.  What happens if there's more than one child?  Surely then you have to divide the estate ... to which many protested that they leave the farm to only one child - presumably cutting the others out the will completely like it's 1730?  The problem with this would be that dependents can now put in a claim on any estate that unreasonably cuts them out.  

A memorable case was Heather Ilott who took her late mother Melita Jackson's executor to Court when she decided that she'd rather leave her £486,000 estate to the cats home than her own biological daughter who she had disowned for marrying the wrong gentleman.  I think she got £50,000 in the end.  A shame really as that's the plot of Pride and Prejudice can never happen again - where all 5 daughters have to get married because property is entailed and can only be passed to a male heir and if they don't they'll be destitute.  I mean, if they wanted to preserve their way of life that much why don't they get Captain Swing back, break up the threshing machines and go back to the feudal system?  And no one else has their way of life preserved - the rest of us are left to Adam Smith's invisible hard ... but as ever the rich don't really want a free market either.  At least not one where everyone is subject to the same tax regime.  They've only had their IHT tax break since Thatcher brought it in in the 80s anyway ... alongside abolishing the rates for the Poll Tax and getting rid of tenants rights...

It's odd that we have a society where so many people are obsessed with IHT ... The average age of inheriting parental wealth is about 50 so what have these people been doing with their lives until then?  Are they all just sitting round waiting for octogenarian parents to kick the bucket of animal feed?  Presumably if the survival of the business as a unit mattered so much to these people they could gift if to their children 7 years before death or are they literally all working till they fall off their perches...?

Question for farmers protesting about inheritance tax.

Consider a farmer who has £5m of land. He has 2 children. One wants to continue with the family farm and the other works in a town.

How is the money handed down? Does the town son get any money or does the farmer son keep…

— Matthew Stadlen (@MatthewStadlen) November 19, 2024

Chinny rub of the Week

Apparently Essex Police turned up at the door of Allison Pearson on Remembrance Sunday to say someone had reported her for posting something "racist" the previous Remembrance Sunday.  They told Allison the exact date of the post but wouldn't tell her the words she used.  Allison didn't think to put in a Subject Access Request or check her own timeline but fortunately the Guardian have done it for her.

Update... The following press releases were put out by Essex Police...

Officers attended an address in Essex and invited a woman to come to a voluntary interview. 

They said it related to an investigation into an alleged offence of inciting racial hatred, linked to a post on social media.

We police without fear or favour and that’s why we respond to alleged offences which are reported to us by members of the public.

For clarity: a complaint of a possible criminal offence was made to the police and this is why we called; to arrange an interview.

Everyone was polite and professional throughout the brief conversation.

As this was a call to set up an interview, no extra details were given. That’s because we have to follow the law and make sure that everyone’s rights and entitlements, in particular to seek legal advice, were respected.

This is the right way to do things – it’s the correct procedure as set out by the Police And Criminal Evidence Act 1984 (PACE).

Fuller details of an alleged offence are always provided prior to the commencement of a voluntary interview, under caution. That allows those present to seek appropriate legal advice and representation if they wish to.

As part of our investigation, we’re liaising with the Crown Prosecution Service regarding an alleged offence which was reported to us by a member of the public. This is an investigative stage review – nothing more.

Essex Police cuts crime. There were over 9,000 fewer reported offences in the last year and 20,000 fewer than five years ago.

Our officers and staff, some of which are military veterans, work 24 hours a day, seven days a week to keep the public safe and investigate crime.

We police without fear or favour and when a crime is reported, we investigate.

That’s what we do and that’s what the people of Essex expect.

There has been a large amount of false reporting about an ongoing investigation and the force has registered complaints with the Independent Press Standards Organisation (IPSO).

FURTHER UPDATE: 10.30am, Saturday 16 November:

Essex Police complained to Independent Press Standards Organisation (IPSO) on a matter of factual accuracy.

The force has been asked to provide further factual information.

This morning, the following verbatim lines were passed to IPSO.

These lines are as spoken by an officer who attended an address in Essex on Sunday 10 November and were clearly captured on Body Worn Video.

Officer: "It’s gone down as an incident or offence of potentially inciting racial hatred online. That would be the offence."

Officer: "Because of what’s been alleged and the evidence that we’ve got, I need to just ask you some questions."

Officer: "It’s what’s been alleged and if there’s an offence we need to ask questions about then we need to do that."

Essex Police supports free speech.

It does not support inaccuracy. If an alleged crime is reported it is investigated. There is no public interest in falsehood.

Further note: (The verbatim statements above have been provided in this format as opposed to the Body Worn Video footage as it would be wrong to give any information in relation to any addresses visited).

Lest we forget...

It's sad that today so many young people don't remember what the Poppy symbol stands for, who introduced it and what it's all about.  The trouble is, of course, that all the British soldiers who died in the Opium wars of 1839->1860 have passed on now and no one remembers them.  Honestly Queen Victoria must be turning in her grave.
 

From Soup to Nuts

Perhaps this best exemplifies the disconnect between US voters and the US Judiciary over Trump's many legal cases.  Brian condemns a Trump henchman for threatening Ms James but doesn't seem to realise that she's actually in charge of the civil business fraud litigation for inflating real estate assets.  

Neither does anyone else caught up in the ensuing argument seem to realise that Trump's New York felony convictions actually come from a different New York case - the falsified business records hush money case brought by Alvin Bragg... 

Somehow it all seems to turn into noise... what the cases were actually about, who started them and what they mean or meant is lost is a circus of shouting and noise. Noise noise noise... not only does the truth not seem to matter, the facts seem to be muddled into a sort of soup...

James is responsible for the civil lawsuit for business fraud and is after Trump's money. Alvin Bragg is responsible for the hush money case. Please don't get muddled up everyone... https://t.co/n4D2dd2q9H

— Zhu Zhanji - parody - the Xuande Emperor died 1435 (@Zhu_Zhanji) November 9, 2024

There's no law for the rich...

So it seems Donald Trump has successfully run the clock out on his Federal criminal prosecutions for the January 6th riots and the documents he had stolen and stored in his bog.  Meanwhile the Georgia RICO case is stuck in the mud and the New York Hush Money / Election Interference case sentencing is pushed forward to the 26th of November by Juan Merchan.  

Will Juan commit career suicide and create a constitutional crisis by sentencing Donald to prison or will Juan not commit career suicide and create a constitutional crisis by not sentencing Donald to prison?

I pootled over to the Daily Mail whose comments threads and bombarded with nonsense from the Magaverse... much of it trying to conflate Trump's civil New York fraud conviction for inflating his assets with his criminal trial and conviction for paying off Stormy Daniels via Michael Cohen using falsified business records to conceal his actions...  and there was much vitriol and comments along the lines of the Judge would be stupid to actually sentence Donald.  But the Judge wouldn't be stupid.  He would be impartial.

Donald has made a mockery of the legal system but a number of loose ends remain to be tied.  Will Jack Smith resign or will Donald sack him?  What about Donald's co-conspirators who at the moment are not indicted?  Will they be immune from prosecution?  Will Trump prevent their prosecutions by interfering in the Department of Justice or will he, alternatively, allow them to go ahead and then pardon them at the end?  How many people can you plausibly pardon before it becomes a scandal?  Is there such a thing as a scandal anymore?  Richard Nixon must feel a right prune resigning over Watergate now which seems like very small beer indeed next to Donald's scandals.

Here we have the sight of Kemi&Co sucking up to the Don whilst David Lammy appears to pour oil on troubled waters which catches alight by trying to pretend the things he said about Donald don't matter and aren't true.  We look forward to NATO being dissolved and Europe being hammered with trade tariffs which will also hurt the US ... 

Oh well, Western Democracy.  It was good whilst it lasted ... but it looks like we need WWIII.

I'm off to drink some hemlock ...

Stellantis&You Mugs

 

I took in my car the other day and Stellantis & You as they laughably call themselves these days found a numberplate lamp bulb dead and proceeded to quote me £44 to change it.  Here's the replacement bulb (cost £3 for two) which it took me 3 minutes to change ...

Still times is hard down Stellantis & You with Peugeot & Vauxhall having different ends of the showroom.  I went down the Peugeot end to wait for my tyres to be changed because their seats were comfier.  I wonder how they upsell you which of their brands when their cars and engines are effectively identical to the point of sharing the same showroom... Are there invisible lines on the shop floor that salesmen are not allowed to walk over?  I believe new car sales have fallen off a cliff recently...

I don't mind using the local dealer for some jobs that are better done with a hydrologic lift or need removing the side the car for but come on...

You're 'avin' a larf, mate

Nothing to Declare

 I was watching "Nothing To Declare" the other day and apparently the Australians have very strict border security on stuff like food and old relics to stop parasites dangerous to their environment getting into their country and damaging their ecosystem.  Inevitably however some harmful parasites do get through these rigorous controls...

Budget

Things that according to the Press Rachel Reeves might be taxing/cutting to fill the black hole

Lightbulbs

Holidays 

Cheese

Electric Blankets 

Gift Aid

Band aids

Hearing aids

Herrings (Red)

Walking aids

AIDS treatments

Stuffed toys

Furniture 

Fishing Rods

Hydrogen 

Helium

National Insurance 

Frogs

Boats

Lighthouses

Shellfish

The Homeless 

Dogs

Cats

Rabbits

The NHS

Pensions

VAT

Inheritance Tax

Make up your own list...